


The Sexual Misadventures of the Sanzo Ikkou

by NuwandaSnicket



Category: Saiyuki
Genre: Anal Sex, Experimentation, M/M, Porn With Plot, Revenge Sex, characters acting OOC, dear Lord so many sex tags, seriously lots of sex, this is funny I swear
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-03-23
Updated: 2015-03-23
Packaged: 2018-03-19 08:22:59
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 9,289
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3603108
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/NuwandaSnicket/pseuds/NuwandaSnicket
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>What starts as a simple solution to a night of boredom turns into a trip of nonstop sexual escapades.   Everyone/everyone.  Seriously.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Sexual Misadventures of the Sanzo Ikkou

"Yo, Hakkai!"

"He's not here," came the bored voice from the other room. Gojyo pushed the door open a crack, twitching slightly as the cold air hit his mostly naked body.

"Where is he?"

"He and Goku went out to run some errands. There's no food in this God-forsaken inn."

"…..oh." Gojyo paused as he adjusted to this new bit of info. The bathroom was steamed up like there was no tomorrow and he had already gone through the rest of the towels that remained. Somehow he didn't think Sanzo would be willing to relinquish one for him.

Wincing against the cold air, Gojyo pushed the door open, stepping out into the living room and holding the sopping towel about his waist. "Yo, Sanzo. You got any more towels? This one's totally soaked."

The monk glanced in his direction. "Yeah, I think there's one fairly dry one."

"Great." Gojyo couldn't help but grin at the look on Sanzo's face. _Stupid baldy obviously can't take the sight of my naked body. Whatta homo_. "Where's it at?"

"Here." And setting his newspaper aside, Sanzo rose to his feet. "I'll get it."

Gojyo nearly fell over in shock. Whereas he himself had a towel about his waist, Sanzo had nothing. Absolutely nothing. The monk was stark naked.

Gojyo couldn't help but stare, large scarlet eyes running along the fine lines of pale smooth skin, tracing over the toned muscles of Sanzo's stomach and watching the way they moved so fluidly as the monk reached for the towel that was draped over a nearby chair. His eyes traced lower as Sanzo turned to face him, down until…

"You want this or not?"

Gojyo jumped. Sanzo was staring at him with those droopy amethyst eyes of his and holding out the towel…but not _nearly_ far enough. Gojyo took a hesitant step forward, then another. Sanzo sighed.

"Come on, Gojyo, I don't have all day."

Another step was all it took and Gojyo snatched the towel out of Sanzo's hand, quickly pulling it to his body. Rolling his eyes, Sanzo let out another of those all too familiar long suffering sighs, as though he was surrounded by idiots, and then flopped onto the couch again.

Gojyo couldn't stop staring. Somehow it just didn't seem right that he, the renowned playboy, was uncomfortable being naked, and the sex-deprived monk was sitting here as bare-arsed as the day he was born.

"Um….Sanzo?

"Yes?" The monk was busy with a box of cigarettes….apparently the inn wasn't completely without supplies, for Gojyo knew for a fact that all their smokes had gotten water-logged in the second crash.

"Why don't you have any pants on?"

Sanzo spared the kappa a withering glance. "Because you and the damned monkey brat wouldn't stop bitching at each other and we ended up crashing into a lake….again. And now all our clothes are wet and I have nothing to change into." Pulling a single cigarette out of the box, he placed it between his lips and arched one slip brow at the scarlet haired man. "….satisfied?"

Gojyo could feel the heat rising in his neck as Sanzo watched him. "….um, yeah, sure. But….."

"What _now?_ "

"…couldn't you cover up with….I don't know…. _something?_ "

Sanzo growled. "Look, moron, maybe you have trouble suppressing some sort of homosexual urge, but I am comfortable enough with my sexuality that sitting about naked is not an issue. So if you're having difficulties and can't deal with the sight of my nude body, then I suggest you leave. Because I am perfectly happy right where I am, and have no intention of moving."

Gojyo bristled at the homosexual urges comment and opened his mouth to speak, but Sanzo cut him off with a well-shot glare. The kappa's mouth shut like a trap.

"That's what I thought." Sanzo lit the cigarette and took a deep drag of it, head flopping against the couch back and eyes sliding shut. Gojyo stared. He hated relinquishing any fight to Sanzo, the pompous git. Still….he was dripping wet and there wasn't much to be done for it.

He realized then that towel Sanzo had handed him was about as dry as the one about his waist. "Oi, Sanzo, what the fuck? This towel ain't dry!"

"It isn't?" Sanzo couldn't have sounded more disinterested if he had tried. "Oh…maybe I grabbed the wrong one. I know there's a dry one over there."

"Grr, damn you, Sanzo." He growled, and shoved his way past the couch, his leg brushing against Sanzo's as he did so. It surprised him and he jumped.

"Watch where you're going, kappa idiot," Sanzo murmured around his cigarette. "I just finished drying off."

"Yeah yeah…fuck off," Gojyo said, but the skin on skin contact had startled him, and he could feel the flush creeping up the back of his neck. Reaching the table, he paused, glancing over his shoulder at Sanzo to make sure the monk wasn't watching.

Without even turning a gaze in Gojyo's direction, Sanzo spoke up in that utterly bored tone, saying "You have a problem, Gojyo?"

"Just making sure you're not looking…you know…..trying to get a peek at the big man."

"I couldn't be less interested in your naked body than I am," Sanzo answered, complete disinterest in his voice as he continued to read his paper. Gojyo couldn't help but bristle. Even though he didn't want Sanzo's sexual attention, he wasn't used to people not wanting to fuck him. It was rather disconcerting. He didn't like it.

"Feh," he answered, having no better reply, and dropped his towel to the floor. Finding the dry towel at last, he wrapped it about his head and began toweling his hair off. His damn long hair was a pain in the ass when wet….took forever to dry.

Unbeknownst to Gojyo, there was a slight shift of the newspaper as Sanzo raised amethyst eyes to gaze at the show. Gojyo's head was mostly covered, but the monk took his time in allowing his eyes to trace along the kappa's muscular shoulders, down his slim frame and lower, over his backside.

Gojyo noticed none of this, so it came as some surprise to him when, just as he was finishing toweling off his hair, the silence of the room was interrupted by a usually disinterested voice saying "…..nice ass."

"WHAT!" Gojyo would have sworn that he had jumped at least six inches. As it was, he crashed into the table and nearly knocked it over; he almost dropped the towel and began fumbling with it, trying desperately to cover his groin before Sanzo could get a look at that, too. Finally he succeeded and stood, chest heaving, staring at Sanzo with wide shocked eyes.

"…..what?" the monk asked, returning Gojyo's stare but looking utterly nonplussed.

"You….I just…you said….."

"Is there a problem, moron?"

Gojyo glared. " _Yes_ , there's a problem!

"Well?"

Gojyo couldn't believe what he was hearing. "You just told me I had a nice ass!"

"Oh, is that all?"

"…is that ALL! You fucking hit on me and then ask is that ALL!"

"Oh, relax, I did not hit on you." Sanzo rolled his eyes again and turned the page of his newspaper. "Stop exaggerating."

"Look buddy, I think I know when someone's hitting on a dude. I am the king of that."

"What, hitting on dudes?"

"Yes. Wait, no! Dammit, Sanzo!"

"Hey, you said it, not me."

"I meant that I am the king of come-ons. I know when someone is coming on to me."

"Really?"

"Yes." Gojyo glared. He knew he was bright red but he couldn't help it. Sanzo was pissing him off to no end, and it made him even angrier that the monk was still sitting there smoking, totally unflustered.

"So I guess if I asked you to come over here and suck me off right now, that'd be…a big no-no?"

"WHAT!"

"I'll take that as a yes."

Gojyo was more confused than he had ever been in his life. He stared. Finally Sanzo looked up at him. "That was a joke, moron. I wouldn't let you blow me with someone else's mouth."

"…HEY!" Gojyo was too insulted to even realize that what Sanzo had said didn't make any sense….or that he shouldn't be offended by the fact that Sanzo didn't want to fuck him. "What's wrong with me?"

"Where do I begin?"

"I'm hotter than any ass you'll ever get!"

"I'm sure you are. Now fuck off and let me read."

Gojyo was annoyed. On the one hand, he knew that he didn't want to fuck Sanzo…..but now there was something bothering him, that nagging feeling that made him want to prove himself. He shook it off. "Fucking homo baldy monk."

"Yes. Who gets more and better ass than you ever will."

"Bullshit." Gojyo turned away, forgetting that his towel currently only covered his front.

"…nice ass."

The kappa jumped again. "WILL YOU PLEASE STOP DOING THAT!"

"Stop ass-flashing me and I'll stop commenting on it."

"I'm not trying to!"

Sanzo arched a skeptical eyebrow. "Well, its really not that hard, Gojyo. You tie the towel around your waist, and then I don't have to look at your ass anymore." He returned his gaze to the paper. "Not that I'm complaining."

Gojyo stared. "See, when you say things like that, I can't tell if you're kidding or not."

"Sucks to be you, doesn't it?"

A long, silent pause. "…so…are you kidding?"

"I don't know….." Sanzo glanced up. "…..am I?"

The two stared at each other for a long moment. Finally: "…..when are Hakkai and Goku coming back?"

"Not sure. The nearest store is about twenty miles away, though….they weren't sure if they'd make it back tonight at all."

"ARE YOU KIDDING ME!"

"Got a problem, pervert?"

"Um…..no." Gojyo squirmed. You mean I'm stuck here with bedroom eyes priesty all night? ALONE! Aloud he said merely "so…..looks like it might be just you and me, then."

"I guess so." The noise of rustling came again as Sanzo flipped another page in the paper. "So…..what do you feel like doing? Mah jong? Cards? Maybe some sex?"

"WHAT!"

"You can't tell me the thought hasn't crossed your mind."

Gojyo was too shocked to move. "….what….the fuck." He stared at Sanzo as though he had never seen the man before. "When did you become such a little slut?"

Sanzo shrugged. "I wouldn't say that. I'm just bored. This is something that is currently amusing me. But it may not do so for much longer." His eyes narrowed. "So are you up to it, or not?"

Gojyo's head spun. This was all moving way too fast for him….and when sex was moving too fast for Gojyo, there had to be a problem. "Um…..I….."

Sanzo rolled his eyes yet again. "Your indecision is boring." With that, he picked up the paper again and lit a second cigarette, taking a deep drag.

Whoa….wait a minute….. "Um, waaaaait a minute Sanzo….I…."

"Shut up."

"…what?"

"I'm trying to read."

Gojyo was indignant. "But you just said you wanted to fuck me!"

Sanzo snorted. "Yeah, like, a full minute ago!" He brushed a lock of hair out of his eyes. "I'm not interested anymore."

Indignance turned into full-out incense. "….but I'm PRETTY!"

"And right now you're trying my patience. Now piss off."

Goku had once commented on how cold Gojyo was...well, now he could feel the heat burning his face like flame. "Excuse me?"

Purple eyes flickered up to lock their bored gaze in Gojyo's direction. "You want something?"

"You can't tell me you don't want to fuck this." Gojyo did a twirl, the towel flaring out to such a degree that he nearly flashed the monk completely. "Come on, dude...I'm hot. No, I'm MONDO hot."

"Don't say 'mondo'...it makes you more unattractive than you already are."

"I AM SOOO NOT UNATTRACTIVE! Do you have any idea how many people have tapped this!"

Sanzo arched an eyebrow. "You think that your body count of sexual partners is going to make you more appealing to me?" He shook his head, golden hair flying. "Think again, kappa."

Gojyo glared. "That wasn't my point."

"Then just what IS your point?"

"That you can't not want to fuck me!"

"You wanna bet?"

"You said you did!"

"And you took too damn long. Believe it or not, fool, your naked body isn't desirous enough that it piques my interest through your incessant hemming and hawing. Now shut up."

"Oh, so you like things quick, do you? You one of those minute men?" Gojyo snapped.

"I like my partners aggressive," Sanzo shot back.

"Oh, aggressive is it?" Gojyo was seething now. "I'LL show you aggressive!" And without further hesitation, he stepped briskly forward, closing the gap in between the two of them and ending up in Sanzo's lap, his hands clutching fistfuls of golden hair as he yanked the monk forward into as rough and hot a kiss as he had ever used on any chick.

Gojyo roughly nipped at Sanzo's mouth, not even asking for entrance but demanding it. The monk opened to him calmly, the same way that Sanzo did everything. Gojyo's hands released their tight hold on golden locks and slid slowly down the soft skin of Sanzo's shoulders, down his chest. He was surprised to find no tits to grope.

With that thought (and the presence of Sanzo's tongue dancing teasingly across his lower lip and those slim fingers tracing over his back) came the realization that this was in fact not a chick that Gojyo was kissing. The redhead never had been one to think things through when he was operating on challenge mode. Eyes flying open wide, Gojyo pulled back immediately, shoving at Sanzo. The blonde promptly and uncaringly released his hold on Gojyo, who fell backward off Sanzo's lap, towel falling away discarded as the redheaded kappa landed in a heap on the floor, legs splayed wide.

Sanzo stared down at Gojyo with amusement in those purple eyes. "Ah, so Goku was wrong. You really are a natural redhead." Gojyo flushed bright red, and Sanzo's smile grew. "Didn't know it was possible for kappa's to blush...especially pervert ones...and definitely not that far down."

"Will you shut up for half a moment!"

"You're one to talk. I think kissing you was the first time on this trip I've successfully shut you up. If I'd have known that's all it took, I'd have done it a long time ago."

"No you wouldn't have. I don't kiss dudes."

"Then what was that thirty seconds ago?"

"That..." Gojyo searched desperately for an answer and found none. "...that was a mistake."

"Oh?" Sanzo, being his usual insufferable self, didn't sound hurt as most people would, just politely interested. "So I take it there shall be no repeat incidents and I can go back to my newspaper?"

"Um..." Gojyo tapped his fingertips on the floor and chewed anxiously on his lower lip. Sanzo had tasted really really good, like sun dried gunpowder. There was a hint of electricity behind that shimmering glittering gold that spiked Gojyo the way that nothing else ever had. And damn him to hell for it, but he wanted to taste that again.

"You're wasting my time, kappa."

"I'm THINKING!"

"Damn shame. You're much better at making out."

Gojyo stared...not at Sanzo, but not quite not at him, either. His gaze focused somewhere just past him...maybe on the floor, maybe on the couch...it was hard to say. Finally, he opened his mouth, though for a moment or two, no words came out. "...I..." Sanzo waited expectantly. "...maybe..." he paused. "... _maybe_..." Slowly, his fingers brushed ever so lightly over the bare skin of Sanzo's shin, a touch so teasingly soft that it was barely noticeable. Scarlet eyes nervously shifted their gaze upward and met with amethyst.

Staring very seriously down at Gojyo, Sanzo quietly set the newspaper to one side, and then without further delay, he slid gracefully off the couch, pinning the redhead to the floor. "Maybe," he echoed, pressing a soft kiss to the corner of Gojyo's mouth. "Is there an ending to this 'maybe' of yours?"

"...I don't know," Gojyo admitted.

"Hnn...you don't. Well..." Sanzo traced those graceful fingers across Gojyo's forehead, usually hidden by the headband but bare for once, then down through long locks of scarlet hair. "...what do you want?"

"...I don't know," Gojyo said again, laughing shakily. Sanzo ran his thumbs lightly down Gojyo's face.

"Don't lie," he said seriously, staring Gojyo in the eye. "Tell me what you want."

Gojyo shook his head. "I..."

"Then show me."

Surprised scarlet eyes met serious amethyst. Sanzo brushed a lock of red hair back from Gojyo's face. "Show me."

Gojyo stared at Sanzo for mere moments longer, then decisively pressed his mouth to Sanzo's. There was nothing of the confidant Gojyo of moments earlier in this kiss. This time he was fully aware of what he was doing and who he was kissing, and this was unexplored terrain to him.

Not so much for Sanzo, who framed Gojyo's face with his hands and kissed the redhead firmly back, his mouth a gentle but insistent pressure against the other's. Pulling back, he gently licked Gojyo's lower lip. "All bets are off now."

"Wait….what?" Gojyo's eyes, previously half lidded with sheer sensation, snapped wide open.

"Your ass is now mine."

"Wait…no, man, I didn't agree to this." Gojyo struggled to sit up, but Sanzo shoved him down to the floor with one hand.

"Stay down, kappa."

"Hey, no way!"

"Gojyo, so help me, I will shoot you, you insufferably annoying dickhead. You couldn't make up your mind so I made it up for you. You, me, sex now."

"But….no! I'm not gay!"

"Like that matters." Sanzo grabbed a handful of red hair and climbed up off of Gojyo, yanking him to his feet. "Come on."

"OW!" Gojyo squirmed. "The fucking hurts, man! Let go!"

"No."

"Sanzo!" Getting aggravated now, Gojyo swung out with a punch. Sanzo caught the kappa's fist in one hand and slammed him against the wall.

"My, we're difficult, aren't we? Are we always this rough in bed, or am I just a special case?"

"You're a _mental_ case, is what you are, priest, if you think I'm going to fuck you!" Gojyo hissed, struggling against Sanzo.

The monk arched one golden brow. "Who said you'd be the one doing the fucking, hmm?"

Red eyes went impossibly large and round. "No way," he choked. "You are NOT going to butt pirate me, no way no how!" One knee thrust forward, aimed at Sanzo's groin, but the monk ducked aside just in time. Unfortunately the evasive motion caused him to give up some of his hold on Gojyo. In a second the kappa had slipped from Sanzo's grasp, kicking the monk's legs from under him and pinning him to the floor.

"Ha!" Gojyo crowed triumphantly. "Think you're so tough, do you? Who's getting fucked now?"

Those purple eyes showed no sign of defeat, and Gojyo felt a hint of confusion. Sanzo thrust forward, pressing his mouth to Gojyo's, kissing him forcefully. "You," the blonde hissed between his teeth. Gojyo stared at Sanzo as if through a haze of fog, feeling dull and confused after that tempestuous kiss. He realized suddenly with some surprise that Sanzo had slipped out from under his hold and was kneeling before him.

"Hey….wait a minute…."

"Gojyo…" Sanzo pressed forward, slim fingers tracing lightly across soft skin as his hands framed Gojyo's face, "come on. Give it up." And he kissed the kappa again, lips a gentle but insistent pressure against Gojyo's own. For a moment Gojyo sat stiffly, unwilling to yield but unable to push Sanzo away. Then, a groan rumbling in his throat, he melted into Sanzo, fingers roughly fisting themselves in blonde hair as he forcefully pulled the monk into him. Sanzo pressed into him with equal force, nipping roughly at Gojyo's mouth until the redhead opened to him, and then it was a harsh dance of tongues, teeth clashing painfully at times as each struggled for dominance over the other. By the time they pulled apart, neither could breathe.

Sanzo's hair was a mess and his chest rose and fell with his labored breathing. "Bedroom," he managed, and rose to his feet.

Gojyo watched him go, unable for the moment to do anything else. Honestly, he wasn't sure how Sanzo managed it. He couldn't even get a coherent thought in his brain, let alone figure out how to stand up. He was thinking it went something like left foot first...then...maybe right foot...he tried it and tipped over. Okay, hands first...placing his hands palms flat to the floor, he pushed himself up to his feet (yes, that did it) and booked it after Sanzo, who was already halfway into the other room.

The priest quickly found his back flat against the wall, and it was not done gracefully. He would have winced had he been anyone else but Genjyo Sanzo. "What do you..." but he got no further. Gojyo pressed a quick kiss to his mouth and then trailed it downward, his mouth never lifting from Sanzo's skin as it continued tracing wet kisses down Sanzo's jawline and throat, fingers scrambling needfully over those strong shoulders.

"The bed is less than two feet away," Sanzo said. "Couldn't you wait ten more seconds?"

Gojyo pulled back long enough to utter a rapid "no," and then continued with what he was doing.

Sanzo couldn't help but smile. "Horny kappa."

"Damn straight." Gojyo continued his path downwards, taking great delight in tracing teasing wet trails over Sanzo's flat stomach with his tongue. Each time he licked the smooth soft skin, a shiver would go through the priest's body and it filled the redhead with smug delight. Then, moving lower, he was greeted with something he was not at all used to.

Gojyo may have been the world's biggest playboy, and he may have been damn pretty, but he didn't do guys. It was just something he had never messed around with. And now here he was, on his knees with cock in his face. Damn those huge amethyst eyes.

He had no clue what to do. Well, not no clue...Gojyo had certainly been around the block enough himself that he figured he knew how to give a pretty decent blowjob, but he didn't have any...er...hands on experience of his own. Still, Gojyo was not one to back down...from anything. Taking a deep breath, he readied himself for this.

And found smooth slim fingers under his chin, tilting his face upwards, and Sanzo leaning forwards. "Don't do that."

"...what! But you..."

"Up." And Sanzo used a handful of red hair to tug Gojyo to his feet and with one push sent the kappa stumbling into the bed. The backs of Gojyo's knees hit the mattress and his legs gave out from under him. He felt the bed soft against his back...slightly lumpy, as could only be expected in a place like this...and anyway, this wasn't good porn he and Sanzo were making here...this was "Bless Me Father, Purge My Body with Your Holy Cock" porno, and it was in a seedy motel...so what could he expect but a lumpy mattress. Really, he was lucky it was as soft as it was. But now he was getting distracted, and Sanzo was straddling his hips and doing things with his mouth...wait, what WAS Sanzo doing?

Gojyo's entire body twitched suddenly as he felt the warmth of Sanzo's mouth on his dick and he couldn't keep his hips from bucking, nor stop the muffled gasp that escaped his lips. "Gah! Sanzo!"

"Mm?"

"What're you...I...what?" Gojyo didn't really want to ask the question that he felt should be all too obvious: why are you, Genjyo Sanzo, sucking a lowly kappa off after refusing to let him do the same for you?

"Is there a problem, Gojyo?" Those graceful fingers traced lightly over the redhead's arousal, and Gojyo could barely suppress the whimper of raw need that rumbled through his throat.

"What're you doing," he managed at last.

"Sucking you off," Sanzo answered, blunt as ever. "I should have thought that to be quite obvious." One hand stroked along Gojyo's inner thigh, which twitched in response.

"But….you just….you wouldn't let me…and then…"

"Gojyo…"

"….yeah?"

"…shut up."

"….okay."

"And relax." Sanzo traced one hand lightly over Gojyo's hipbone and down over his thigh, rubbing softly soothing circles, but Gojyo couldn't relax. He remained the way he was, weight resting propped up on his elbows so that he could watch Sanzo at work. Seeing Sanzo day to day, that bored look in his eyes and his mouth set in a firm harsh line was nothing like seeing the monk now. His eyes were half closed as he pressed a gentle kiss to Gojyo's inner thigh, that light touch sending shivers through the redhead's body, and then he took Gojyo's arousal into his mouth, and the kappa nearly lost all control on the spot. How could he ever have underestimated that mouth? Those lips were made for smutty deeds in dark corners, for pornographic work on satin sheets….for sex. He couldn't hold back the moan this time and wouldn't have wanted to anyway. His back arched and his head tipped back, hair spilling in a crimson wave against the mattress.

Sanzo's mouth was a constant warm pressure, applying just the right amount of friction, knowing just what to do because, Gojyo supposed, he wasn't some chick who didn't have a dick and therefore had no fucking clue what hurt or what felt good. Actually that was probably the reason girls did other girls….though Gojyo fucking hated that….unless they were double teaming him….the thought made him smirk.

Until Sanzo slapped his face. "OW!" He started in surprise. "What was that for!"

"Wipe that obnoxious smirk off your face, kappa," Sanzo glared. "I know you're thinking about some perversity, probably involving tits, and I'm not going to fuck you while you do that."

…..how the fuck did he know? As always, Gojyo was amazed at Sanzo's powers of perception.

"….unless you just want to stop right now?" Sanzo's thumb grazed over Gojyo's aching erection, the nail scraping across his slit and making him cry out at the pleasurable pain it caused, leaving him feeling so empty when Sanzo stopped.

"No," he managed, his voice very breathy, the words all tumbling out now in a rush. "No. No, I'll stop, I'll stop."

"Good." And Sanzo rewarded him with a fierce kiss, a kiss that didn't last nearly long enough for Gojyo, though he could taste himself on Sanzo's lips and that was a strange thing for him. The monk went back to work and a sigh burst unchecked past Gojyo's lips, his head flipping back.

"Dammnnn, Sanzo. Where on earth did you learn to do that?"

A chuckle rumbled in Sanzo's throat, barely audible while his mouth was otherwise occupied, and then the monk paused long enough to say "You'd be surprised what they teach in shrines these days."

There was a moment's disbelieving pause and then Gojyo burst out laughing. He couldn't believe this, any of it. Couldn't believe that he was here, that he was fucking a dude, let alone Sanzo, couldn't believe that Sanzo was making jokes. This whole situation was just too crazy.

Then he felt a stirring deep within him and his fingers clenched in the fabric of the bedsheets automatically. "Sanzo…..oh, fuck, SANZO!"

He came hard, hips arching up off the mattress, and he was dimly aware that he was murmuring a marred version of Sanzo's name over and over again. Moments later, as his breath evened out, he realized that at some point he had actually relaxed against the mattress without realizing he had done it. His hair lay in a mass across his face. Lifting a hand, he brushed it aside, slowly opening his eyes at the same time.

Sanzo was lying beside him, chin cupped in one hand as he silently watched Gojyo with those calm purple eyes. Gojyo didn't know what to say.

"Um…hi."

"Hello." The monk just continued staring, his face very serious and golden hair hanging in his eyes in a most becoming way.

"Um…..I don't know what we do now," Gojyo confessed. "Do I say thanks, or…"

"Do anything so lame as thanking me and I'll have to hurt you."

Gojyo grinned. "That's more like you. But I mean, usually with a chick, you just keep going, like….I go down on her, and then usually she ends up in my lap, and I sort of fuck her like that for a while….and then we switch to something else, like…" he got no further before Sanzo was on him, a hand on each of Gojyo's wrists, pinning the redhead to the mattress.

"God, you never shut up, do you?"

"….not really, no."

"So you want to fuck me like a chick, is that it?"

"…it would certainly make things easier."

"Well unfortunately for you, that's not going to happen. First of all, I don't have the equipment for it. Second of all, I would never sink so low as to sit in your lap and let you fuck me."

"…..you're kind of in my lap right now."

Sanzo glowered. "I've got you pinned to the bed, kappa. There's a difference."

"Yeah?" Gojyo leaned upwards and licked Sanzo's cheek, slowly dragging his tongue across the monk's skin. "Not much that I can see." The last words came as a whisper teasing against Sanzo's ear, and the monk nearly shivered at the sensation. Instead, he gave Gojyo a smack.

"Stop that."

"Stop what? Being sexy?" Gojyo batted his eyes up at Sanzo. "Sorry, can't help you there. I was born this way."

"Pffft, in your dreams."

"If I wasn't sexy, you wouldn't be fucking me."

"I'm not."

"WHAT!" Gojyo winced at the way the word came out in a high-pitched squeak. "You're not! Then what are we doing here?"

"Relax, moron. I meant I'm not at this precise moment."

"Oh." Gojyo felt silly now. He stared abashedly up at Sanzo. "Oops."

Sanzo shook his head, hair falling into his eyes again. "Idiot."

"Yeah, well what're you gonna do." Gojyo stared up at Sanzo. That hair and those eyes put together really was a dynamite combination. He recalled when he had first met Sanzo and the village girls had asked him about any women he'd been dating….and he had referred to Sanzo as such. A really bitchy blonde. Sanzo was truly more lovely than any of those bimbos back home.

"….what?"

The wary edge to that voice stirred Gojyo back to reality. "Huh?'

"What's the problem now?" Sanzo asked.

"Nothing." And bolder than he ever thought he could be, Gojyo reached up and brushed a lock of golden hair out of Sanzo's face, tucking it behind the monk's ear. Sanzo's eyes widened in surprise as the redhead leaned upward and kissed Sanzo gently, his mouth a soft but insistent pressure. After a moment, slim fingers moved to trail down Gojyo's cheek, encouraging him, and the kiss deepened.

Gojyo struggled to sit up, to even out the levels they were on and Sanzo wrapped an arm about his back, helping him, pulling him closer. Their bodies melded together as they kissed. Gojyo's kiss was still hesitant, still nervous; his tongue flicked cautiously across Sanzo's mouth and the monk yielded, parting his lips to allow Gojyo to explore as he wished.

Gojyo couldn't believe how good Sanzo tasted. He had always thought it was a cliché when he was younger and had stolen smutty novels (the only porn he could get away with at that age), just a stupid notion that a person could taste a certain way, like strawberries or wine. But Sanzo really did have a unique taste…like rain. But with an energy to it….Sanzo tasted of the rain just before an electrical storm. He deepened the kiss, sucking at Sanzo's tongue and the blonde moaned into Gojyo's mouth, fingers tracing idly down the smooth skin of Gojyo's throat and lower, over his chest, one fingertip tracing lightly over a nipple. Gojyo wrenched free from the kiss with a gasp of surprise.

"Sensitive, are we?" Sanzo teased breathlessly, smiling ever so slightly.

"Bastard," Gojyo managed to choke out, but he was laughing as he said it. "Fucking sadist!"

"You know it." And in one fluid motion Sanzo had flipped Gojyo onto his back, pinning the redhead to the bed. He kissed Gojyo briefly, then moved down, tracing a wet path with his mouth across Gojyo's throat, pausing here and there to nip, suckling the soft flesh so hard that Gojyo's back arched up off the mattress, so roughly that the kappa just knew he'd have marks the next day, killer marks.

Sanzo continued his teasing path onto Gojyo's chest, pausing to bite roughly at the flesh above his collarbone before moving on, his tongue leaving a moist trail as he went, and then those dynamite lips closed about one nipple.

"Gahh! Nnnn, Sanzo…" Gojyo couldn't sit still, he just couldn't, not when Sanzo's heavenly mouth was going to work in such teasing tantalizing divinely fantastic ways….his hips rubbed upwards against Sanzo's body, searching for more contact, for friction.

Sanzo trailed one fingertip across Gojyo's lower lip and the redhead nipped at it, taking it into his mouth and sucking at it. Sanzo didn't let him have his fun for long though, pulling the finger back and using it to torture Gojyo further, teasing the now moistened fingertip across Gojyo's other nipple.

"Sanzo!"

The monk pulled back, and the face that regarded Gojyo now was smiling broadly. "I'm surprised your nipples are so very sensitive, Gojyo. I'd hate to see what you'd be like were they pierced." There was a pause and Sanzo tipped his head to one side, considering the flushed kappa. "….though actually, I'm sort of surprised a pervert like you hasn't done that already."

"I'll do it tomorrow," Gojyo managed breathlessly. "Gold hoops with little charms hanging off 'em…charms with your name on them. Big purple writing that says 'I heart Sanzo'…."

Sanzo laughed, the noise rolling in his throat like the purr of a cat, and Gojyo felt it was the sexiest thing he'd ever heard. "You do that and I really will shoot you, moron."

"Whatever, you know you'd love it, baldy."

Sanzo laughed again, but his hands were moving, trailing down Gojyo's sides and back, under his legs, tugging at his thighs and spreading them wider. Gojyo felt he should be objecting but couldn't anymore, he just couldn't. Not when he looked at that flushed face and those big lilac eyes, golden hair more lovely than the prettiest sunrise.

Sanzo's hands gently slid across Gojyo's inner thighs, easily spreading them wider as he positioned himself in between them. "Suck on this," he said, holding his fingers out to Gojyo.

The redhead arched an eyebrow. " _Wow_ , Sanzo, that was the most street thug I think I've ever heard you sound. Can you say that just one more…." But he never got to finish, for rolling his eyes, Sanzo shoved his fingers into Gojyo's open mouth. "Mmph!" Gojyo uttered a surprised noise, then willingly sucked at Sanzo's fingers. Once they were good and coated, Sanzo pulled them out. Free to talk again, Gojyo immediately did so. "What's _that_ about?"

"God, you really don't shut up, do you?"

"We've covered that ground already, and no, I don't. Now what's with the finger suckage? My mouth can't touch your dick but your fingers are okay?"

"I didn't want you sucking my dick because…." Sanzo stopped abruptly. "….nevermind," he muttered.

"No, come on! What is it?"

"Nothing." _Because I didn't want your first time to be something you'd regret._ But Sanzo shook away the thought, hating to think that he could possibly be thinking something that pathetically sentimental for one of his travel companions. "Forget it."

The tone to Sanzo's voice indicated that this conversation was most definitely closed. "Okay…..so….what's with the finger suckage?"

"I don't have any lube on me. When I left on this trip, fucking a youkai baka was definitely not on my To Do list."

"I guess you just didn't take into account my amazing sex appeal."

"Yes, that must be it. Now scoot towards me a bit."

Gojyo complied. "Why, what's this about?"

"I needed to get some of the weight off your backside."

"Why?"

"Will you quit it with the Twenty Questions already!" Sanzo sighed. "God, you're as bad as the Monkey sometimes."

Gojyo bristled, but the glare Sanzo gave him told him he had better not say anything. Then he felt one moist fingertip rubbing at his entrance and he started in surprise, back shooting up off the bed. "SANZO!"

"Shhh, relax." Sanzo's free hand went to Gojyo's chest, to restrain or relax, Gojyo wasn't sure. "It's going to feel odd, but just deal for a few and it'll be good."

Gojyo leaned back on his elbows, though he didn't relax all the way. "Okay," he said, eyes narrowed, "but you'd better be right about this."

Sanzo smiled a bit at that, and his finger teased around that tight entrance again. He heard a sharp intake of breath from Gojyo, but the kappa didn't move, so he kept going, slipping one moist finger inside.

"Sssssstttttt," Gojyo let out his breath in a hiss between his teeth. "Fuck, man."

"Just relax," Sanzo instructed. "The more you tense up, the more it'll hurt."

"YOU try having something stuck in your ass!" Gojyo shot back. He paused, considering what he had just said. "….though actually, you always kind of act like you've got something stuck up your ass. Maybe that's why you're so grouchy all the time."

"Yes, that's it. Goku's Nyoi-bo? It doesn't just turn into a sansekkon staff. It turns into a dildo, too," Sanzo answered dryly, taking advantage of Gojyo's preoccupation to twist and move his finger, stretching the tight ring of muscle.

"I knew it."

"Just don't tell him. God only knows what he'd do with it. Probably try to eat it."

"No doubt. Bet the monkey doesn't know what a dildo is."

Sanzo laughed, slipping another finger inside and scissoring the two fingers. Gojyo bit back a noise of some kind and Sanzo paused. "….you okay?"

"Nnn…yea."

"Hurting too much?"

"No…it feels okay."

"…okay?"

"…yeah." Gojyo didn't want to admit it, but this was actually starting to feel pretty damn good. He shifted his weight on the bed, hips arching up, inadvertently thrusting onto Sanzo's fingers. "Ahh, fuck!"

"A bit eager, are we?" Leaning forward, Sanzo licked Gojyo's stomach, trailing his free hand over the redhead's arousal.

"Fuck, Sanzo, that's good."

"Hn," Sanzo chuckled. "You're ready. Don't know how ready, but you want it, so who am I to deny you?" He withdrew then, fingers leaving Gojyo empty and drawing a disappointed whine from the kappa.

"Hey, what're you doin'?"

"You, in about two minutes," Sanzo answered, then paused, thinking over what he had just said. "Why is it whenever I'm with you, stupid and horrific puns come out of my mouth?"

Gojyo grinned. "Didn't anyone ever tell you stupidity was catching?"

"Oh God. Let's just hope perversity isn't so also." Sanzo spit into his palm and ran his hand over his own erection, making sure he was well lubricated before pressing into Gojyo.

The kappa hadn't been ready for this. He thought he was, but no, this was totally different. He had been thinking all night about how slim and graceful Sanzo's hands were….well two fingers were nothing compared to having a dick in him. His fingers clutched at the blankets, struggling for some kind of hold on something, anything to help him deal.

Sanzo allowed his weight to rest against Gojyo. "It's okay. Hey….look at me." Scarlet eyes opened to meet lilac. "You okay?"

"…..yea."

Sanzo smiled. "No, you're not. But you will be. Give it a few." And leaning forwards, he gently kissed Gojyo, his hands framing that beautiful face yet again, loving the way it's smooth angles fit so perfectly in his hands. Slowly, Gojyo's fingers released their hold on the bedsheets, reaching instead for Sanzo, tracing tremblingly over soft strong shoulders, clinging to golden locks.

Sanzo pulled back, gently licking Gojyo's lower lip. "Feeling a bit better?"

Gojyo shifted a bit and was surprised to note that yes, the pain was ebbing away. "Yes."

"Good." Sanzo pulled out and thrust gently back into Gojyo, who let out a low hiss. "Too much?"

"No." The answer was low and guttural.

"You want me to…"

"FUCK, Sanzo, don't stop."

Sanzo couldn't help but smile at that. "If I'm a sadist, you're a masochist."

"Yea, whatever, I don't care, just keep going."

Sanzo shrugged. "If you like." He thrust into Gojyo again, and this time didn't stop, continuing at a steady past. One hand slid underneath Gojyo's knee, pulling the kappa's leg up and about his waist. Gojyo didn't protest, even though it was a position he usually put girls in. At this point, anything that brought him more physical contact with Sanzo could only be seen as a good thing.

Still, it wasn't enough. Sanzo was being teasingly slow in his movements, and Gojyo's erection was aching to be touched. He rubbed his hips upward against Sanzo's body, searching for more friction, and Sanzo closed one hand over Gojyo's arousal, pumping him in time with his own thrusting. Gojyo let out a whimper, one fist going to his mouth and he bit down hard, anything to control this need, this endless aching need within him. But it wouldn't be controlled. Despite the hand to his mouth, the words slipped out anyway.

"Sanzo," he gasped. "Sanzo, I need…."

"What is it," Sanzo leaned forwards, nipping at the soft flesh of Gojyo's throat. "What can I do?"

Gojyo didn't know how to put the desire into words. "…..I need…more."

"…..more what?"

"…..I don't know." Gojyo felt like laughing, like crying. It was all so new and he had no idea what to do, how to ask for what he wanted, because he hadn't the faintest clue what it was he wanted.

Fortunately, amazingly, somehow Sanzo did. The monk ground his hips fiercely into Gojyo, thrusting harder then any time before, and Gojyo cried out loudly.

"Ahhhhh! Yes. Yes," he managed. "Like that…..ahh, Sanzo…."

Sanzo brushed a stray lock of crimson hair out of Gojyo's eyes. "You're so fucking beautiful," he mumbled, his body moving rhythmically with the other man's.

Gojyo couldn't believe what he was hearing. Surely this wasn't Sanzo…not the Sanzo he knew. Not the Sanzo who called him moron….pervert kappa….not the Sanzo who threatened to kill him on a daily basis. Did that Sanzo just call him beautiful? "…..Sanzo," he managed.

But the man just kissed him, an insistent kiss like none that went before, the most passionate kiss Gojyo had ever had. He could feel something from Sanzo that he'd never felt before and it confused him, but it affected him too, and it pulled at him in much the same way that Sanzo's hand did, those skilled fingers teasing over his arousal. He came hard, crying out Sanzo's name loudly. Sanzo followed shortly after, his thrusting becoming erratic as he mumbled Gojyo's name over and over into that scarlet hair, his lips brushing against Gojyo's throat.

Gojyo felt empty when Sanzo pulled out of him, but the feeling abated some as the monk lay down, his weight half atop Gojyo and half beside him, their legs tangled together. He watched the monk, looked at the flushed face, a beautiful blush lingering across that pale skin, the golden hair a tangled mess, the amethyst eyes closed as Sanzo struggled to steady his breathing. Had Sanzo really called him beautiful?

Then the monk stirred, and for the millionth time that night, Gojyo found himself being watched by lilac eyes. It was strange. Seconds previous, Sanzo had seemed nothing like himself. He was disheveled, he was in the throes of passion, he was….enflamed. He was like a totally different being. Passion had ruled his body. He had had emotion. Now he was totally calm again, and though he was still as disheveled and flushed as he had been moments before, he was Sanzo again. Those eyes were as serious as they usually were. Well….not quite. Gojyo could still see a hint of that….whatever it was….right around the edges.

"You should get some sleep," Sanzo murmured.

"You too," Gojyo responded immediately. Sanzo chuckled, that low laughter rumbling deep in his throat and Gojyo could feel the heat rising again in his body just at the sound of it.

"Feh...I'm not tired."

"Me neither." Gojyo tossed scarlet hair out of his eyes. "So...looks like Goku and Hakkai aren't making it back tonight."

"So it would seem." Sanzo's legs were still tangled with Gojyo's, a level of familiarity that seemed odd when matched with the calm indifference in his voice.

"...oh well. Probably a good thing. This might be a bit hard to explain."

That laugh again, that dead sexy laugh. "Yeah."

There was a long moment's silence. The minutes stretched by into what seemed like hours. Gojyo didn't know what to do. Not only was he not used to the whole after sex game with guys, but he also had to try to figure out how to play it with Sanzo...and if ever there was someone who was the total anti-cuddler, it was Sanzo. And damn if Gojyo didn't just want to pull the monk close and hold him all night long. _What the **hell** has gotten into me?_

"Well...goodnight, then," he spoke up at last.

Sanzo let out a funny little chuckle. "Hnn." And leaning over, the monk pressed his mouth gently to Gojyo's, kissing him one last time, a soft chaste kiss that wore away all of the redhead's anxiety, telling him that somehow this was okay. "Goodnight," Sanzo whispered. But before he could lie down again, Gojyo had one arm about his shoulders and had dragged the monk down on top of him, pressing their bodies close together.

"Go to sleep," he murmured, pressing a kiss to Sanzo's temple. Sanzo rolled his eyes a bit at Gojyo's cuddling, but he draped an arm over Gojyo's chest and, heaving a sigh, allowed his eyes to slip shut.

Outside, the sky was practically devoid of light, pitch black and with only a sliver of moon visible. Gojyo wouldn't have been surprised if Hakkai and Goku had stayed in town just to avoid getting lost in the desert. He was glad they'd done so, both for their own safety and because it had allowed him on this night to find his own light in his own way.

Sanzo's hair glittered brighter than the moon, lighting up the darkness and filling Gojyo with confusion and doubt, but it was the most delicious doubt he had ever known. Slowly, his eyes never once leaving the lovely form next to him, Gojyo fell into a surprisingly restful sleep.

 

**~*~**

 

"GOJYO! HEY! PERVY KAAPA!"

Gojyo shot up with a start….or tried, anyway. He found that he was pinned to the bed by a heavy weight. Glancing down, he saw Sanzo's naked body half on top of his. Memories of the night before came flooding back and he couldn't stop from grinning. Then, he realized that the voice in the other room belonged to Goku. Aw, shit.

The door burst open. "Hey, GOJYO…" Goku stopped dead in the doorway, staring. "…..Gojyo….?"

Hakkai followed shortly after. "Goku, they may not even be awake yet, it's only…OH." His eyes went impossibly round and he too froze. "Oh, my." There was a long silence as the three men stared at each other. None seemed sure what to say.

Sanzo chose that perfect moment to wake up, groaning as he rolled over and stretched like some kind of feral cat. Sitting up, he brushed some hair out of his eyes and stared at the two men in the doorway. "…..what's with the face, monkey?"

"…Sanzo…..why are you sleeping in bed with Gojyo…..and….." Goku's head tilted to one side. "…where're your pants?"

Hakkai flushed at that, but a small smile leapt to his face, a smile he was trying very hard to suppress. "Come on, Goku, why don't you and I go in the other room and have a little talk."

"Hakkai! I wanna know what's going on!"

"Well, come with me and I'll explain."

Gojyo stared as Hakkai gently but forcefully took the boy by the shoulders, guiding him from the room. "See, Goku….when a man and a woman…." he paused. "…..or sometimes two men….love each other very much…." again he paused. "…..have the same level of sexual compatability…." he corrected. And with that he shut the door behind him and the voices grew too muffled to be easily understood.

Gojyo let out a groan, flopping back against the pillows. Sanzo smirked, staring down at him. "Problem, kappa?"

"God, I hate to think of what it's going to be like once Hakkai tells the monkey about the inner workings of sex."

Sanzo laughed. "I doubt Goku will be that interested." He leaned back against the pillows himself, arms folded behind his head. Gojyo glanced at him.

"So…..we good?"

"Why wouldn't we be?"

"Don't be a prick."

The barest trace of a smile flitted across Sanzo's lips, and he glanced at Gojyo, nodding. "Yeah. We're good."

Gojyo smiled at that, leaning over and pressing his mouth to Sanzo's. Suddenly, the door slammed open with such force that Gojyo tumbled off the bed in surprise.

"SANZO!"

The monk groaned. " _God_ , what is it _now_ , monkey?"

"Did you REALLY do that with Gojyo?"

"I have no idea to what you are referring," Sanzo answered glibly. Gojyo rose from the floor, rubbing his now aching rear and grumbling under his breath about stupid chibi chimps.

"You KNOW what I'm talking about! You put your….your _thing_ ….in his…. _place_ ….and….and…."

Sanzo let out one of those sighs he was so famous for and rubbed at his eyes. "Hakkai, beer please."

Grinning, Hakkai tossed him one. "Way ahead of you."

Sanzo popped the can open and took a deep swig before answering. "Yes, Goku. I put my 'thing' in his 'place."

Monkey eyes went impossibly large and round. "….EWWWWWWWWWWWW!"

Sanzo shook his head. "As always, maturity reigns supreme in this place." Tilting his head back, he took another long sip when Goku asked another question, this one far more unexpected.

"So, will you do that with _me?_ "

Sanzo choked, spitting beer all across the room. Gojyo tumbled to the floor in hysterical laughter and Hakkai had a hand over his mouth, desperately trying to stop from laughing himself. "…NO!" Sanzo managed at last, trying to gain control of himself. "What're you..." he fumbled for words. "...NO!"

"Why NOT! You did it with GOJYO!"

"That's DIFFERENT!" Sanzo was blushing bright red, trying to wipe the beer off his front with one of the towels from the night before, but it was still damp.

"Why! Why is it different!"

Gojyo walked by, bedsheet about his waist and a brazen smirk on his face. "Cause I'm hot, monkey, and you're just an immature baby chimp whose dick is probably the size of a cocktail frank."

"It is NOT! And I'm just as hot as you are!"

"Oh, in your dreams."

"In a minute, I'm going to shoot both of you." Sanzo grabbed the end of the bedsheet and pulled hard, nearly succeeding in yanking it from around Gojyo's waist, but the kappa caught it last minute.

"HEY! What're you doing!"

"Drying myself off. Thanks to Goku, I'm covered in beer."

"Well then a bedsheet isn't going to help you much," Gojyo shot back, pulling forcefully at the cloth.

"Yes," Hakkai commented, still leaning against the doorframe. "You don't want that to dry...you'll be all sticky. Maybe you'd better take a shower. I can finish drying the towels while you do so."

"Maybe I _will_ take a shower," Sanzo murmured pensively, dropping the sheet. He had barely made it more than two steps before Goku was running after him.

"Can I come?"

Gojyo pounded Goku over the head with one fist. "HELL no! Monkeys not allowed!"

"Oh, but pervert kappas are?"

"Pfft, of course! We belong in water!"

"Hey! That's cheating!"

"Tell you what. When Sanzo decides he wants to fuck in a tree, you're welcome to partner him. Until then, he's mine."

"I wasn't aware I belonged to either of you," Sanzo said dryly. "But in a moment, I'm going to say screw you both and I'm going to go make sweet shower love to Hakkai."

The fourth man couldn't help but laugh, though his face flushed at the idea. "No, please, the three of you play your games and leave me out of this."

"I don't want either of them." Sanzo stepped into the bathroom and turned around, coming face to face with both Gojyo and Goku. "I'm going to go shower now," he said, very quietly. "If anyone disturbs me, I will kill them. Literally. I know I say that a lot, and usually I mean it...but this time...I mean it about a million times more than the most I've ever meant it. Now fuck off." And with that he shut the door in their faces.

Goku kicked the wall. "Shit, man." Grumbling under his breath, he walked away and flopped into a chair. "This is no fair, man. How come he'll fuck YOU and not me!"

Gojyo smiled. "I already told you, stupid monkey. I'm hot." But there was an anxiety behind that smile. Sanzo's behavior wasn't out of the norm, for Sanzo. But he still wasn't sure what all that was last night...and now he was feeling even more nervous about the whole thing. There had also been something in Hakkai's face that he hadn't quite understood....something not altogether happy.....and it made him extremely unsettled.

In the bathroom, Sanzo tilted his head back under the shower, allowing cold water to drip through his hair. He couldn't clear his mind. Somehow it kept coming back to a pair of scarlet eyes, soft lips moaning his name...he banged his head against the tiled wall. This was not what he had had in mind at all.  
In the living room, Goku was still bitching, alternating between complaining that he was as sexy as Gojyo and that he was hungry.

"I'm making lunch as fast as I can, Goku," Hakkai answered. "It's going to be about five more minutes."

"Here, I'll help." Gojyo rose to his feet and as he did so, the bedsheet got caught on the corner of the table. With a mighty ripping noise, it rent in two, falling to the floor.

"Oh dear." Hakkai blushed.

Goku stared. Then, a grin spread across the boy's face. "So I was wrong. You really are a natural redhead."

"Shut the hell up, monkey."

 

**-tbc-**


End file.
